Crazikus #22

Batter up Kiddo!

Spring Training is in the air...

And dirty beer farts.

Stop. Smell the roses.

Pay no attention to the...

decomposing corpse.

I'm rubbing raw meat

All over my new sweat pants

Running from the wolves

Spring Training!!!

It's here. After months of no baseball and beyond frigid temperatures, baseball is growing its little nuggets in Arizona and Florida. This means that good weather is coming soon..ish.

Big Z came into came with a big bandito mustache, and it was awesome.

But, he has already shaved it because of constant ribbing from his team. So, that's the first loss this spring.

Too bad. I was looking forward to many professional photos of that beautiful stache.

But, I am still so ready for some baseball...stache or no stache. 

Even without Wood and Derosa (which completely pissed me off), this is still the Cubs, and I keep coming back for more torture. Let's hope for many more months of great baseball with minimal torture in October.

Crazikus #21

A still beating heart

Rests upon a kitchen floor

Mr. Clean....is.....dead

Flying through the air

The flock of birds set their aim

Clean cars. Raining poo.

Constantly itching

Sleeping in the attic now

On insulation

Crazikus #20

Used Torso for sale!

At the Dahmer Residence!

Act Now...it's Half Off!

If Birds are lovers,

Then Bees must be the fighters.

Terrible Sex-Ed.

Shaving for hours

I hit bone, and my blade dulls

I'm the Gillette Man!

Crazikus #19

Twenty-Four and Lost

Two shows that capture my brain

And feed it to me

Horatio says:

I love my Good N' Plenty

And my sunglasses

Standing Silently

Head tilted...eyes gazed downward

H says something lame

Crazikus #18

Yes, I am slacking

in creating these haikus

What's it to ya, bud?

Dancing in the dark

I stub my toe. While screaming...

I notice a corpse

Don't poke the body

It's filled with gasses and pus

Call Horatio